Comments for Everyday Leadership http://www.danmulhern.com Everyday Leadership Wed, 16 May 2012 05:58:17 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v= Comment on Anna Led With Her Best Self by Dan Mulhern http://www.danmulhern.com/2012/05/14/anna-led-with-her-best-self/comment-page-1/#comment-16390 Dan Mulhern Wed, 16 May 2012 05:58:17 +0000 http://www.danmulhern.com/?p=5925#comment-16390 Veronica, Thanks for your comment. Yes, the paradigm shift you talked about is EXACTLY what I talked about. Sometimes things like this make so much sense, I forget I have to argue for them :-) I have worked with firms that have "mistake of the month" awards and/or invite people to present on mistakes they have made. So often, as individuals and companies, our mistakes teach us more than our successes. Great people and great companies aren't trying to prove they're perfect, they're working to get a little less imperfect :-). D. Veronica,

Thanks for your comment. Yes, the paradigm shift you talked about is EXACTLY what I talked about. Sometimes things like this make so much sense, I forget I have to argue for them :-)

I have worked with firms that have “mistake of the month” awards and/or invite people to present on mistakes they have made. So often, as individuals and companies, our mistakes teach us more than our successes.

Great people and great companies aren’t trying to prove they’re perfect, they’re working to get a little less imperfect :-) .

D.

]]> Comment on Anna Led With Her Best Self by Dan Mulhern http://www.danmulhern.com/2012/05/14/anna-led-with-her-best-self/comment-page-1/#comment-16389 Dan Mulhern Wed, 16 May 2012 05:56:09 +0000 http://www.danmulhern.com/?p=5925#comment-16389 Otis, Thanks for one of the most candid and unfortunately real comments I've read in this space. I've been stewing on it for a couple days. Here are my quick thoughts: 1. I was writing for those in authority who believe, as Kouzes/Posner write about the paradox of power, "we become most powerful when we give our own power away." I was suggesting ways that people in authority who understand this multiplier effect can promote it. Some authority figures, as you point out, just don't get that. They think their job is to control, be smarter than everyone, maintain order, etc. 2. As you develop your intuition and experience around how authority figures respond, I would recommend that you do everything you can to look for bosses who are secure enough in themselves and have a view of their organization through which they believe that candor, openness, and challenge are GOOD things. Regardless of that: 3. Some of those frustrating features of authority discussed at the end of #1 above are necessary and in the right measure they are good. Things like order and clear boundaries CAN help people to work (and keep the tensions down among people). So, it's important for you and me and others who follow to try to understand the pressures on authority figures (as well as their values and style). So, for instance, I could "yell" at my wife the governor that she should tell x, y or z to go-to-you-know-where, but she had pressures on her that made that impossible. She had to live with those adversaries (or pressuring friend) and live with the fallout. So I had to try to anticipate and understand "where she was coming from." Often the mistake people make in "managing up" is that they really don't see the full systemic picture, e.g., budget constraints, legal constraints, political give and take, all of which make it hard for authorities to throw open the doors to input. Similarly, some authorities really need control (yet they can speak as though they are an open book); so it's important to test the waters before you go diving in. I hope these thoughts help to extend your thinking. It sounds like you really come wanting to make a difference and contribute. Stay at it!!! D. Otis,
Thanks for one of the most candid and unfortunately real comments I’ve read in this space. I’ve been stewing on it for a couple days. Here are my quick thoughts:
1. I was writing for those in authority who believe, as Kouzes/Posner write about the paradox of power, “we become most powerful when we give our own power away.” I was suggesting ways that people in authority who understand this multiplier effect can promote it. Some authority figures, as you point out, just don’t get that. They think their job is to control, be smarter than everyone, maintain order, etc.
2. As you develop your intuition and experience around how authority figures respond, I would recommend that you do everything you can to look for bosses who are secure enough in themselves and have a view of their organization through which they believe that candor, openness, and challenge are GOOD things. Regardless of that:
3. Some of those frustrating features of authority discussed at the end of #1 above are necessary and in the right measure they are good. Things like order and clear boundaries CAN help people to work (and keep the tensions down among people). So, it’s important for you and me and others who follow to try to understand the pressures on authority figures (as well as their values and style). So, for instance, I could “yell” at my wife the governor that she should tell x, y or z to go-to-you-know-where, but she had pressures on her that made that impossible. She had to live with those adversaries (or pressuring friend) and live with the fallout. So I had to try to anticipate and understand “where she was coming from.” Often the mistake people make in “managing up” is that they really don’t see the full systemic picture, e.g., budget constraints, legal constraints, political give and take, all of which make it hard for authorities to throw open the doors to input. Similarly, some authorities really need control (yet they can speak as though they are an open book); so it’s important to test the waters before you go diving in.
I hope these thoughts help to extend your thinking. It sounds like you really come wanting to make a difference and contribute. Stay at it!!!
D.

]]> Comment on Anna Led With Her Best Self by Veronica Sanitate http://www.danmulhern.com/2012/05/14/anna-led-with-her-best-self/comment-page-1/#comment-16381 Veronica Sanitate Tue, 15 May 2012 17:28:10 +0000 http://www.danmulhern.com/?p=5925#comment-16381 I appreciated the 7 points given to motivate people to lead. I intend to try some of them on myself-- e.g. # 4, set goals that push me to reach beyond. But number 5, "let them know it's safe to try and fall short" -- that may be true in a classroom situation, but it seems like it's not safe-- or comfortable--anywhere to fall short if you are the leader or trying to be. It is probably a huge opportunity for growth, though. Also, I appreciate Otis's comments above. Maybe you are talking about a paradigm shift, Dan, where encouraging leadership does not challenge (or threaten) the status quo. A company that encourages leadership would be a great company to work for! I appreciated the 7 points given to motivate people to lead. I intend to try some of them on myself– e.g. # 4, set goals that push me to reach beyond.

But number 5, “let them know it’s safe to try and fall short” — that may be true in a classroom situation, but it seems like it’s not safe– or comfortable–anywhere to fall short if you are the leader or trying to be. It is probably a huge opportunity for growth, though.

Also, I appreciate Otis’s comments above. Maybe you are talking about a paradigm shift, Dan, where encouraging leadership does not challenge (or threaten) the status quo. A company that encourages leadership would be a great company to work for!

]]> Comment on Anna Led With Her Best Self by Otis http://www.danmulhern.com/2012/05/14/anna-led-with-her-best-self/comment-page-1/#comment-16365 Otis Mon, 14 May 2012 13:59:51 +0000 http://www.danmulhern.com/?p=5925#comment-16365 I often have a unique perspective on life, and some might say I'm a pessimist. However, I have found that many of these things are said out loud at my places of employment, but what actually is acknowledged/rewarded/celebrated is exactly the opposite. For example: "You acknowledge the heck out of each individual for their "small" wins." - "Small" LOSSES are acknowledged with much greater frequency than "small" wins. I have been told that "small" wins are "why you get paid" and should not be celebrated. "In every way you can, you let them know it's safe to try and to fall short." - ...if you are willing to justify why you wasted your time...if you are willing to accept less than meeting expectations because nothing "positive" came out of your risk... "You believe they can lead and continually build your faith in them." - ...but only if management agrees with your leadership style... I have repeatedly (and in retrospect, naively) taken these concepts at face value, and I have repeatedly found myself in trouble for working above my pay grade, challenging the people who should not be challenged, trying to show leadership/influence outside my department, etc. It is very frustrating because it feels like the message I hear is that I can lead as long as management tells me it is okay to do so. In my experience, being unique and being open to others' perspectives is only celebrated if it is his perspective (and not "one of the other cooks in the kitchen"). It is also better to challenge folks who have less power than do you. Any thoughts or advice? I often have a unique perspective on life, and some might say I’m a pessimist. However, I have found that many of these things are said out loud at my places of employment, but what actually is acknowledged/rewarded/celebrated is exactly the opposite. For example:

“You acknowledge the heck out of each individual for their “small” wins.” – “Small” LOSSES are acknowledged with much greater frequency than “small” wins. I have been told that “small” wins are “why you get paid” and should not be celebrated.

“In every way you can, you let them know it’s safe to try and to fall short.” – …if you are willing to justify why you wasted your time…if you are willing to accept less than meeting expectations because nothing “positive” came out of your risk…

“You believe they can lead and continually build your faith in them.” – …but only if management agrees with your leadership style…

I have repeatedly (and in retrospect, naively) taken these concepts at face value, and I have repeatedly found myself in trouble for working above my pay grade, challenging the people who should not be challenged, trying to show leadership/influence outside my department, etc. It is very frustrating because it feels like the message I hear is that I can lead as long as management tells me it is okay to do so. In my experience, being unique and being open to others’ perspectives is only celebrated if it is his perspective (and not “one of the other cooks in the kitchen”). It is also better to challenge folks who have less power than do you.

Any thoughts or advice?

]]> Comment on How Lieutenant Colonel Negin Inspired and Impressed Me – And You? by Jim Dworman http://www.danmulhern.com/2012/05/07/how-colonel-negin-inspired/comment-page-1/#comment-16274 Jim Dworman Mon, 07 May 2012 17:58:17 +0000 http://www.danmulhern.com/?p=5915#comment-16274 Dan, Just this weekend I met a young (30 - 35) Chrysler engineer who was lamenting the brain drain in his department. In the downsizing resulting from the turnaround effort of the last 6 or 7 years, much of the institutional knowledge of engine design had been lost, as senior engineers had been enticed or forced into early retirement. He thought it would take years for Chrysler's U.S. engineering staff to regain what was lost. In the meantime, you might see a lot of re-badged Fiats bearing the Chrysler nameplate. On baseball: are you going to see the Tigers this weekend in Oakland? The 2011 version of Doyle Alexander, Doug Fister, should be pitching Saturday or Sunday. Jim Dan,

Just this weekend I met a young (30 – 35) Chrysler engineer who was lamenting the brain drain in his department. In the downsizing resulting from the turnaround effort of the last 6 or 7 years, much of the institutional knowledge of engine design had been lost, as senior engineers had been enticed or forced into early retirement. He thought it would take years for Chrysler’s U.S. engineering staff to regain what was lost. In the meantime, you might see a lot of re-badged Fiats bearing the Chrysler nameplate.

On baseball: are you going to see the Tigers this weekend in Oakland? The 2011 version of Doyle Alexander, Doug Fister, should be pitching Saturday or Sunday.

Jim

]]> Comment on What Happens When Somebody Attacks You by Dan Mulhern http://www.danmulhern.com/2012/04/30/what-happens-when-somebody-attacks-you/comment-page-1/#comment-16273 Dan Mulhern Mon, 07 May 2012 17:22:56 +0000 http://www.danmulhern.com/?p=5901#comment-16273 Pat, Thanks for sharing your difficult story. It sounds tortuous to be away from Noah. You are and will remain the most important model for him. Don't forget that. Love is an awful lot like leadership. And "modeling the way" may be the most important thing we can do as leaders and parents. So, your commitment and ability to keep moving forward, to fight to change what you can and adapt to the rest, is the most important thing you can do for - or show to - Noah. Life is making you have to demonstrate perseverance, patience, adaptation. Aren't these all things that Noah will need? Keep leading with your best Pat, Dan Pat,
Thanks for sharing your difficult story.
It sounds tortuous to be away from Noah.
You are and will remain the most important model for him. Don’t forget that.
Love is an awful lot like leadership.
And “modeling the way” may be the most important thing we can do as leaders and parents.
So, your commitment and ability to keep moving forward, to fight to change what you can and adapt to the rest, is the most important thing you can do for – or show to – Noah. Life is making you have to demonstrate perseverance, patience, adaptation. Aren’t these all things that Noah will need?
Keep leading with your best Pat,
Dan

]]> Comment on What Happens When Somebody Attacks You by Dan Mulhern http://www.danmulhern.com/2012/04/30/what-happens-when-somebody-attacks-you/comment-page-1/#comment-16272 Dan Mulhern Mon, 07 May 2012 17:14:13 +0000 http://www.danmulhern.com/?p=5901#comment-16272 Active Advocate, Wow! That's a lot. Personally, I love # 7, especially the part about others' "attacks" hitting old wounds and fearful thoughts. I suspect in my little example the man's outrage was reactivating the little boy who tried to obey all the rules (and was punished when he didn't), the little boy who didn't want to be stared at by the whole room when he did something wrong, and the deep and ancient male who has been hard-wired to fight or flee when attacked. Fear implicated in all of them. The other thing I love love love about your comment is this line: "How about deep, authentic, honesty, courteously phrased, as a leadership quality to emulate?" Honesty is the #1 quality people say they want in a leader they will willingly follow. And by the way, you consistently model this in your posts, IMHO. Thanks for your reflections. Dan Active Advocate,
Wow! That’s a lot.
Personally, I love # 7, especially the part about others’ “attacks” hitting old wounds and fearful thoughts.
I suspect in my little example the man’s outrage was reactivating the little boy who tried to obey all the rules (and was punished when he didn’t), the little boy who didn’t want to be stared at by the whole room when he did something wrong, and the deep and ancient male who has been hard-wired to fight or flee when attacked.
Fear implicated in all of them.
The other thing I love love love about your comment is this line:
“How about deep, authentic, honesty, courteously phrased, as a leadership quality to emulate?”
Honesty is the #1 quality people say they want in a leader they will willingly follow.
And by the way, you consistently model this in your posts, IMHO.
Thanks for your reflections.
Dan

]]> Comment on How Lieutenant Colonel Negin Inspired and Impressed Me – And You? by Tim http://www.danmulhern.com/2012/05/07/how-colonel-negin-inspired/comment-page-1/#comment-16271 Tim Mon, 07 May 2012 17:01:52 +0000 http://www.danmulhern.com/?p=5915#comment-16271 Dan, Fully agree with LtCol Negin's thought on leadership and "one size not fitting all." In my view, true, inspiring leadership is flexible and dynamic. To successfully lead others, you tailor your leadership to fit the individual; and sometimes you don't lead the same person the same way. It's all about what's effective, as you frequently remind us. Leading groups versus leading individuals - now that might be an interesting thesis (smile). After 25 plus years in the Marines I thought I knew a lot about leadership. Now, after 10 years of Federal Civil Service, I have come to realize that I really didn't know that much. I think one of the biggest leadership challenges is "leading up" and trying to positively influence seniors to do what's best for the organization and the Nation. Regarding your topic of shunting "seniors" off to the edges of the organization. What a truly fascinating topic. I see that in my current work place and ocassionally feel it personally. It is never intentionally directed at me; it's just a dynamic of my work environment. Keep up the inspiring work! Aloha, Tim Dan,

Fully agree with LtCol Negin’s thought on leadership and “one size not fitting all.” In my view, true, inspiring leadership is flexible and dynamic. To successfully lead others, you tailor your leadership to fit the individual; and sometimes you don’t lead the same person the same way. It’s all about what’s effective, as you frequently remind us. Leading groups versus leading individuals – now that might be an interesting thesis (smile). After 25 plus years in the Marines I thought I knew a lot about leadership. Now, after 10 years of Federal Civil Service, I have come to realize that I really didn’t know that much. I think one of the biggest leadership challenges is “leading up” and trying to positively influence seniors to do what’s best for the organization and the Nation.

Regarding your topic of shunting “seniors” off to the edges of the organization. What a truly fascinating topic. I see that in my current work place and ocassionally feel it personally. It is never intentionally directed at me; it’s just a dynamic of my work environment.

Keep up the inspiring work!

Aloha,

Tim

]]> Comment on How Lieutenant Colonel Negin Inspired and Impressed Me – And You? by Dan Mulhern http://www.danmulhern.com/2012/05/07/how-colonel-negin-inspired/comment-page-1/#comment-16270 Dan Mulhern Mon, 07 May 2012 16:42:40 +0000 http://www.danmulhern.com/?p=5915#comment-16270 Carrie, I agree when you ask: "Why should you expect you boss or your company to come to you to make a place for you?" You shouldn't. And good for you for staying relevant and sharp. That's the healthy perspective of the (elder) worker. I was writing from the perspective of the organization, however, and in that case, I think it IS incumbent upon them to create a culture that both taps and directs the wisdom of elders, AND a culture that generates the kind of lifelong learning you demand of yourself. As a resource matter, just as you don't squander the resource you are, management has a fundamental responsibility/opportunity to maximize its precious human resources. I don't think the ideas are at all incompatible. D. Carrie,
I agree when you ask: “Why should you expect you boss or your company to come to you to make a place for you?” You shouldn’t. And good for you for staying relevant and sharp. That’s the healthy perspective of the (elder) worker.
I was writing from the perspective of the organization, however, and in that case, I think it IS incumbent upon them to create a culture that both taps and directs the wisdom of elders, AND a culture that generates the kind of lifelong learning you demand of yourself. As a resource matter, just as you don’t squander the resource you are, management has a fundamental responsibility/opportunity to maximize its precious human resources.
I don’t think the ideas are at all incompatible.
D.

]]> Comment on How Lieutenant Colonel Negin Inspired and Impressed Me – And You? by Dan Mulhern http://www.danmulhern.com/2012/05/07/how-colonel-negin-inspired/comment-page-1/#comment-16269 Dan Mulhern Mon, 07 May 2012 16:38:05 +0000 http://www.danmulhern.com/?p=5915#comment-16269 John, It's always good hearing from you. I remember the first time we talked; your tremendous insight about marketing blew me away then, as you have so many times since. Intriguing title for a book. D. John,
It’s always good hearing from you. I remember the first time we talked; your tremendous insight about marketing blew me away then, as you have so many times since.
Intriguing title for a book.
D.

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