04-24 Scared Witless

Friends,
About 10 years ago I got the chance to go to Outward Bound in Leadville, Colorado.  They invited us to put on a harness, trust one of our colleagues to belay us with a safety rope, and climb a 100 foot sheer wall of rock.  It was a chilly fall morning, and my body was shaking €“ partly from the cold but mostly from extreme anxiety.  I decided to watch the others for a while; I cheered, I laughed, I nearly wet my pants.  And, I took my turn.

With my heart pumping right out of my chest, I climbed.  Now, sometime after my tree-climbing kid days I had become really fearful about heights, especially when I could look straight down, over an edge.  I was hoping this experience in Colorado would destroy that fear.  And so, about 25 feet up the rock face, I took a deep breath and forced myself to look down, fully hoping the terror would be chased away by my climb.  And guess what?  . . . It wasn’t.  Instead, a wave of fear rushed through me, raising goose bumps on every inch of my skin.  If I hadn’t been wearing a safety helmet, my hair would have looked like Don King’s.

In that instant, I realized one of the biggest lessons I have ever learned in life:  sometimes you are scared €“ shall I say scared witless - but you climb anyway, with the fear right there with you.  The fear is there.  You climb anyway.  Maybe you face some fear like this when you fly, speak publicly, challenge authority, ask someone to go on a date or to donate money.  You’re scared, but you climb anyway!

With my companion, fear, I climbed and reached the top.  My colleagues slowly let the slack out of the safety rope as I pushed back off the wall and they brought me back down to the ground.  My muscles were twitching.  My heart was still racing.  And the climbing instructor said, Great job.  How would you like to try it again . . .blindfolded?  She wasn’t kidding.  I rushed off to find a bathroom!  I came back and let them tie a bandana across my eyes, lead me up to the rock, and I climbed again.

A second remarkable thing happened to me that day:  the marvelous thought appeared, I’m climbing, and it kept surpassing the fears of slipping, falling, and the anxiety about all I could not see.  I felt terror, but again, I knew, I just had to stay at it.  The joy of doing what needed to be done simply surpassed the fear.

There is plenty to fear in our world.  A struggling economy, downsizing and outsourcing, school testing, aging, and raising teenagers!  Individually and collectively, we wonder if we can scale the rock. We fear failure, falling, and pain.  Last week, as I wrote a commencement speech, I was reflecting on this rock-climbing experience, and one detail stuck out so vividly.  It is that which I want to share and close with: In times of challenge how wonderful to have a mentor!  That instructor asked, How would you like to try it again . . . blindfolded?  Now, do you think I would have EVER come up with such an insane idea on my own, something so preposterous, so far beyond my imagination, let alone my ability or belief?  Absolutely, no way.  She led me to a place I never could have gone on my own.

As you take on the routine challenges of rock-climbing in your world, do you have someone who invites you to climb blindfolded?  Who will watch, encourage, teach, but especially challenge you to stretch beyond what you imagine or think possible?  Sometimes mentors appear out of the blue, as that guide did.  But I’d advise you to seek such a mentor, if you really want to

Lead with your best self,
Dan