4th of July Leading and Listening

Friends,

I marvel at what our Founding Fathers wrought when they declared independence 230 years ago tomorrow. In action, democratic leadership is wild, fascinating, and full of challenge. At no time is this more true than during an election, like the one my wife faces in November. In this period, leaders in their own right seek to move Jennifer by urging her to do what they consider good. Whether they are environmentalists or fundamentalists, big city dwellers or Yoopers (our friends in the Upper Peninsula, or UP), feminists or motorcycle riders, they are trying to move her. And at the same time she is trying to move them, to motivate them to work for her overall view of a better world.

Jennifer continually lets people know that she truly wants to hear their views. She must get 50-500 opinions a day. I picture hundreds of people with Jennifer at the center and everyone trying to nudge her and the government in a different direction. As her spouse, I have 5-10 people a day telling me how our team can do things differently - whether that is governing or campaigning. They are all trying to lead. The jostling is a sign of a healthy democracy.

As leaders we have to listen. Each perspective is uniquely part of the picture. Each perspective brings new ideas and involvement in communities and involvement in democracy. So, those we are privileged to lead, must be heard. . . even though it’s sometimes hard. When the advice feels more like attacks, I sometimes want to put it bluntly, “Have you even listened to the other side?”

A leaders gut-level response to fight back is what youth coaches feel when parents assail them, what CEOs feel when the papers question them, and what managers feel when they are criticized. So, we have to remember one of the most energy dampening things leaders can do - in politics, business or life - is to stop listening. When we stop, we lose people’s motivation and their trust. Cynicism hardens and the democracy weakens. When we ask people to care about our company, congregation, or community, we must be prepared to do the hard work of listening. When we allow true candor, we will in time generate the capacity in those we lead to accept candor in return. And open, two-way communication generates both learning and trust.

Our Founding Fathers undoubtedly listened to a great variety of opinions. The freedoms our democracy produces are well worth the wild ride. Cultivate the courage and trust to listen and …

Lead with your best self,

Dan