Speaking of Leadership
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Feb
28
Lower the Bar
Filed Under All Posts, Reading for Leading | 21 Comments
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I’d never met a composer before, but had the pleasure on Sunday of meeting David Winkler. David’s composition “Winds of Time,” was premiered at Michigan State University with violinist Dmitri Berlinksy conducting the chamber orchestra. David is the husband of my friend Kathi Elster, who is co-author of the acclaimed book Working for You Isn’t Working for Me. We had brunch together. We seasoned the food and peppered David with questions about how a composer imagines a piece, develops it, and how he interfaces with the conductor. Although his work is more complicated and intricately developed, I couldn’t help but think that it parallels that of a coach, a general, perhaps a CEO. He develops a complex plan that others must execute. We smiled at his stories of how hard it is to “let go” as he hears musicians not quite appreciate and execute his full artistic intent.
“I have to write for people,” he said, fully appreciating how obvious that probably sounded. He explained that one of the things he has learned to do is to write lines of music that let a musician ease into the work. He knows he will ask them to execute very difficult technical dimensions, so he wants them to get there with ease and momentum. The point he made echoed one I’d just read in Dan and Chip Heath’s excellent new best-seller Switch: How To Change Things When Change is Hard.
The Heaths’ book brims with research, great stories and this seminal image: Our brains experience a battle for control, where our logical side, which they refer to as the Driver, must battle the need, passion and fear-driven emotional side of our minds. They call this side the Elephant, and you can imagine which side wins all too often. Consider the battle in your head that occurs when an aromatic slice of your favorite Grand Traverse Pie Company pie is steaming before you: does the Driver have a chance against the Elephant? Here’s the point that the Heaths make, which like composer Winkler’s strategy in writing offers us so much sense when, as they say, “change is hard:”
“A business cliché commands us to ‘raise the bar.’ But that’s exactly the wrong instinct if you want to motivate a reluctant Elephant. You need to lower the bar. Picture taking a high-jump bar and lowering it so far that it can be stepped over. If you want a reluctant Elephant to get moving, you need to shrink the change.” (italics in original)
Our plans are for people. Good to remember as you
Lead with your best self,
Dan
Feb
22
Should I Shu-u-u-u-t U-u-up?
Filed Under All Posts, Reading for Leading | 8 Comments
A rare RFL clarification to my prior post. I used the words “shut up” today. I wished I hadn’t. I meant it the way kids these days will say “shut up,” with a tone of “no way,” or “get out of here,” or “you’re kidding me.” It was meant to be casual, yet still express my shocking amazement at Lincoln and Washington being entirely self-educated.
I should have known that readers would not be able to HEAR my
light-hearted used of heavy words. And, I’m sorry if my words felt
insulting. The first blog comment chastised me, understandably, for
sounding callous in these tough times. And he suggested I should think
about “privilege.”
If you felt similarly, let me push back about that. Lincoln and
Washington were not privileged. That was the major point. They
experienced poverty in Lincoln’s case, and the loss of a father in
Washington’s. They weren’t at great private schools, charter schools, or even public schools. Lincoln experienced more defeats than most of us ever will, yet he kept on. And although people like me, vested with
attachments of privilege, are “supposed to be” deferential, docile, and
demure, I’m not sure that’s always the role for people with formal
authority. My point, poorly made, was this: anyone can do anything,
especially in these times. And yes, even if unemployed, even if not
privileged, even if disadvantaged. I did not mean to insult those in
trouble but to challenge and encourage by the inspiring example of
Washington and Lincoln.
I’m grateful to the early commentator who prompted this unusual second RFL.
Love to hear your thoughts as you
Lead with your best self,
Feb
21
Washington Lincoln You
Filed Under All Posts, Reading for Leading, frontpage | 61 Comments
Friends,
What does this say to you? Abraham Lincoln had only about a year of formal schooling. George Washington was schooled by his father, until the latter died when Washington was eleven years old. His schooling ended then.
Our two greatest presidents – who led the country through its two most treacherous times – were both enormously learned, voracious readers and bibliophiles, yet with almost no formal education. What’s that say to you?
To me it says, “Shut up!” With the extraordinary resources of the internet, of libraries, and bookstores, we are so blessed. What CAN’T we learn? What new career, language, skill, knowledge, trade, or business lies beyond any of us? None, unless we think it so, or unless we lack the drive and the discipline and the overarching purpose to improve ourselves to become better-for-others.
If you’re looking for inspiration, look no further than Washington and Lincoln to encourage you to
Lead with your best self.
Dan
Feb
14
You Can Lead Up
Filed Under All Posts, Reading for Leading | 4 Comments
Friends,
I came at it from a bunch of different angles on Saturday. Topic: How do you get heard? I interviewed a radio producer to see just how the successful supplicants managed to get on JP McCarthy’s morning drive time show. I talked to Lindsay a PR student as MSU about the tactics she’s using to get people to pay attention to her about the census – yawn (about the topic, not Lindsay). I talked to Patty, a 5′1” communications expert who told my listeners: “Stand tall, sit tall, speak tall.” I talked to Crowley & Elster about their book Working for You Isn’t Working for Me, and to John Baldoni, whose recent book captured, the topic, Leading Your Boss.
As a radio interviewer I sometimes find myself hearing my voices of doubt ,saying things like, “maybe this wasn’t a great topic,” or “maybe I didn’t look hard enough for guests,” or “everybody already knows this stuff. This week I kept thinking instead, “wow that’s an interesting perspective,” or “It’s amazing how people with such different perspectives arrive at such similar conclusions.” And I kept having the thought I love to have when I’m doing my “Everyday Leadership” show, this stuff is so USEFUL.”
Hopefully, you’re wondering, “What? What? What was so interesting?” Well, listen to the show. If you’re trying to lead up or across with boss, co-workers, other divisions, managers, etc., you’ll find it fascinating. In the meantime, here’s the Spark Notes:
1. Know your audience. And here I mean the audience of one, whom you’re trying to move. The people you’re trying to move have different values, pressures, temperaments, and they have different audiences than you do. It’s nice – and totally naïve – to think that the boss should be dying to know your perspective and adopt it whole cloth. The truth is he or she continually lives in their own thoughts, skin, context, and your voice is just one. The more you can understand how they think, what they value, and what challenges they face, the better your chances of getting through.
2. Prepare. If you have a moment at a board meeting, 15 minutes with the boss, 60 seconds with the mayor, you have to be ready. I watched my wife at the Gridiron Diner in D.C. – a comedy roast. Everyone was in tails and gowns. It was all fun and laughter. But I watched Jennifer pick her way through the room. “Michigan is ready for wind technology,” she began with Energy Secretary Chu. “Race to the Top is a great initiative,” she told Education Secretary Duncan, “We’d love to make Detroit one of your first visits as you roll it out.” While most people were kicking back, enjoying the jokes, the people-watching and chance encounters, she was making every second count. She knew who she wanted to see and what she wanted to convey and/or learn.
There’s way more on the show. But if you’re committed to leading up, you’ve got to know your audience and prepare well, to…
Lead with your best self,
Dan
Feb
7
Character(s) and Family
Filed Under All Posts, Reading for Leading | 30 Comments
Jack is 12. Kate is 20. They remain my best leadership lab: I study their behaviors, and study myself acting in response. I like family leadership, because it’s real, raw, unpretentious, yet the stakes are high. This week the two reminded me that it’s important to exercise my authority. I mean “exercise” both in the sense of using it, but also in the sense of practicing it like a craft. I, as much as my children, am a work in progress, and so I am always recalibrating.
Our little man has been an amazing leader in our home, honing his native skills of emotional intelligence. For instance, when one of his friendly interruptions provokes one of my impatient eruptions he’ll be quite direct: “Geez, Dad,” he’ll say, “seems like you’re pretty wound up today.” He stops me in my tracks. Or, when Jen comes home from another day of battle in Lansing, he’ll say, “Let’s watch American Idol,” and then back it up by offering a shared vision of how things can be: “We need to lighten things up around here. Life doesn’t have to be so serious, you guys.” His sensitivity, humor and kindness have lifted us a hundred times over. (For our part, we thank him, recognize the vital role he plays, and also try to tell him in words and action, that it’s not his job to take care of us.) There’s no doubt that he’s often leading up.
Kate has also been an extraordinary teacher. She’s an analytic, objective, impartial, and skeptical thinker who has helped me to see that my way was not the only highway. She and I are so different and she has gone toe-to-toe with me on numerous occasions to make me aware that my “truths” are limited by my assumptions and biases. I have really learned to respect her differences and I look forward to car rides back to college when I can learn from her.
They are also still our children, and we are not afraid to exercise our moral and occasionally penal 
authority – key tools of leadership. And I chose to exercise authority this week. (Their ages – and my respect for them – necessitate me withholding the details of what follows, but any parent or supervisor can fill in the blanks from their own experience.) Both acted in ways – one overt, and the other more covert – that exhibited defiance. And I called them each out. It would have been way more convenient and peaceful to ignore the stuff. Objectively, it was minor. But in their continued development, it had to do with character. And character, like values, is never minor.
We all need people to call us out and call us to a higher standard, to be our best. As parents and bosses we FAIL when we don’t give people feedback about falling short, counsel about why it matters (for them and us), and help for them to locate a path forward that works for them. Especially when it has to do with character. You might examine what you’re tolerating in the way of behavior that falls short of what you, your family or organization, and especially they themselves deserve. Initiate direct, calm, and loving conversations to
Lead with your best self,
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